When couples get married and eventually start a family, they tend to neglect their love for one another as a shift to fulfill duties and obligations arise. Elliot D. Cohen, Ph.D. wrote, “Similarly, the purpose of a marriage or life partnership also involves an emotional support system.” There are many strategies that marriage counselors and therapists recommend to sustain a healthy and meaningful marriage life. This article will focus on the most common and simple ways to protect your relationship and love for each other.
Effects of being taken for granted
Underappreciation is one of the many reasons why couples fight, find someone else to fill the gap, and eventually, get separated and divorced. Women especially go into bouts of depression and low self-esteem, while husbands may feel belittled if their partners do not show any single appreciation of the things that they do. On the other hand, Diana Kirschner Ph.D. says, “Happy couples give their partners the benefit of the doubt when they do something that is disappointing or hurtful. Instead of mean-spirited criticism, rejection, or attack, they often see good or simply uninformed intentions underlying what their partners do or say.”
BetterHelp, an online counseling website, has a lot to say about relationships going down the drain due to the neglect and attention of partners.
Appreciate Your Spouse
Saying thank you can go a long way, especially if you say this to your spouse with more love and tenderness. “Appreciating your spouse is a binding factor in relationships,” says Elizabeth McCormick, a licensed social worker. A ‘thank you’ can be expressed from the very simplest manner of just blurting it out after a deed or task being done. Still, there are other unique ways to extend this positive vibe. Here are some unique ways to show appreciation:
- Make breakfast in bed and place a thank you note on the tray. Exert some effort to wake up early and prepare breakfast for your partner.
- Leave thank you notes in the bathroom mirror, on the fridge or anywhere that he/she will see immediately.
- In the norms of social media mainstream, posting a thank you message in Facebook or tweeting thank you to your spouse can be very influential and can increase one’s self-esteem.
- Arrange a date and take a couples alone time together to talk about the things that you appreciate.
- Buy him/her a gift and add a thank you note. It does not have to be super fancy. The thought that you take the time to get that basketball shoes he always wanted or the handbag that she always goes back to check in the shop will be sufficient. This will surely make your partner’s day sparkle.
- Show off your gratitude by hugging and kissing. Physical contact is believed to help release endorphins or our happy hormones. It does not only makes us grateful, but it will also help to show how you love your partner for being there always.
The strategies above are just some of the few that you can try to demonstrate amorous affection and appreciation to your spouse. You can modify it or even add more spice just to make it more exciting. Getting married may be the final step to be together. However, staying married is a lifelong commitment to keeping the relationship afloat and the fire of love burning.